“It’s all about the bride!”  For the most part, that’s true.  As the bride, you deserve to make your wedding day just as you’ve dreamed.  But as I learned through my Las Vegas wedding planning, sometimes we brides need to realize when to take a few steps back from that mantra.  Take a look at what I discovered at my wedding, so you can skip these mishaps yourself to keep the wedding party rolling!

Do you know what to do when your wedding doesn't go according to plan?

Your wedding is not all about you when…

  • Your Best Man embarrasses you during his toast. The Best Man decided to open his toast with mention of World of Warcraft and strippers.  Umm… what?  I suppose my groom could have sucker-punched his jokester brother for that one, but instead he just laughed.  That’s the best way to handle unforeseen circumstances during your wedding: Laugh!
  • Your mother expresses her deep concern about your choice for her MOB dress. Kate Middleton’s mother may have looked elegant in her dress, but that doesn’t mean my mom wanted to wear that style.  I had to let go of my preconceived notions of Mother of the Bride dress designs and colors to let Mom find an outfit that made her feel radiant.
  • You plan guests’ seating arrangements. My groom and I thought his sisters would get along great with our college friends, so we placed them at that table near the dance floor. Instead, they were horridly offended and carted their chairs to their family’s table right before dinner.  Yeah, I still cringe when I think about how badly I botched that one.
  • Your out-of-town groomsmen need a ride from the airport. The groomsmen traveled from California and Wisconsin to attend our Vegas wedding.  Since they’d spent so much on plane tickets and suits, we needed to give back a bit too.  With official transportation out of our budget, my groom personally picked them up from the airport and spent the day with them.
  • When your MOH dyes her blonde hair black two days before the wedding. Well, my Maid of Honor gave me quite the shock with this one.  But in times like these, what’s done is done.  Bite your tongue, and move along.
  • You need mingle with wedding guests during the wedding reception.  I wanted to hit the dance floor all night long!  But I needed to make my guests feel welcome as well.  My groom and I grooved on the dance floor to open the party and close the party.  Most of the time in between, we made the rounds and spoke to as many people as possible.
  • You’re asked to be at your parents’ house by 9:00 a.m. the morning after your wedding (ugh! So early!) to open gifts and accommodate the extended family that needs to travel that day.  I’m pretty sure I looked like a zombie, but hey!  My family and the new in-laws were happy, and I had the whole next week to sleep in during my honeymoon.
Celebrate the end of your wedding planning with what truly matters!

Brides, I’m sure you’ll find your own little list of situations when your wedding is not about you.  When you feel like you’re being subverted that bridesmaid, Best Man, or overbearing family, take a moment to stop and think: “How much does this really matter?  How will my insistence on my own way affect others?”  Yes, it’s easier said than done.  But now you know what to look for.

If you’ll need someone to keep you accountable, ask your groom for help.  Then when he offers constructive criticism, listen to him… calmly.  Take his advice, talk it over, and make level-headed decisions.

Make a mistake?  We all do.  Don’t be afraid to say you’re sorry, and strive to dodge Bridezilla moments in the future.  Wedding planning can be high-stress work, but with support at your side and your eye on the prize, soon you’ll be finished with this race. Then, thanks to your sacrificing a few “All about me” moments, you’ll still be enjoying the company of close friends, a happy family, and an excellent relationship with the man who loves you.

Article Author:  Allyson Siwajian  © 2011

Photographs: Jamison Frady of Quiet Art Photography  © 2010  (Images used by permission.)